Friday, September 12, 2003
"i feel thin, SORT OF stretched, like butter scraped over too much bread."
where's that quote from? anyone wanna guess? (by the way, i don't know if i got it right verbatim) courtesy of jay & chris, i fixed the quote. 09/15/03
anyway, that's how i feel these days. spread too thin over lots of activities. but i've always been like that. my mom always told me that i do too much. and there are days like yesterday when i was sooo super stressed out. but then i caught myself thinking, hmmm, but i like it like this. it's better than being bored out of my mind! i sooo hate being bored.
but besides feeling like i'm spreading myself too thin, i really do enjoy my life right now. the things that occupy my time are important to me and my future, whether immediate (my current job to supply me money to pay for bills) or not-so-immediate (school and volunteering at that very far hospital). oh and the boyfriend... he brings me so much joy! you gotta have joy in your life. that's extremely important. and the rest, well, it's for my soul- the helping other people and contributing to society, or at least a small community is very important to the soul. but there are also a gazillion avenues to take in order to fulfill your soul. there are lots of needs, but only one you. i think i've become more conscious of where my time goes. there's so much to do, but so little time, as they say. and in the end, i have to pick and choose what to work on.
and yet, at times, i feel like i'm not being a good daughter. that's another thing i've become more conscious about. i'm trying to live my life well and do good things and get busy doing that. i live at home with my parents because it's entirely necessary as i need to not spend on rent in order to decrease this debt i've accumulated during undergrad (evil credit cards!). and i feel obligated to do stuff for my parents since i don't pay rent. but what? i clean what i can, when i'm home. but when's that? when it's time to go to sleep. that's about it. and they don't really understand why my life is like that. so i think they think i'm not a very good daughter. i dunno.... that wasn't a very well formulated thought. but there it is.
just when i think i don't know what to blog about, out it comes. enjoy the weekend! i hear it's gonna be 95 degrees!
anyway, that's how i feel these days. spread too thin over lots of activities. but i've always been like that. my mom always told me that i do too much. and there are days like yesterday when i was sooo super stressed out. but then i caught myself thinking, hmmm, but i like it like this. it's better than being bored out of my mind! i sooo hate being bored.
but besides feeling like i'm spreading myself too thin, i really do enjoy my life right now. the things that occupy my time are important to me and my future, whether immediate (my current job to supply me money to pay for bills) or not-so-immediate (school and volunteering at that very far hospital). oh and the boyfriend... he brings me so much joy! you gotta have joy in your life. that's extremely important. and the rest, well, it's for my soul- the helping other people and contributing to society, or at least a small community is very important to the soul. but there are also a gazillion avenues to take in order to fulfill your soul. there are lots of needs, but only one you. i think i've become more conscious of where my time goes. there's so much to do, but so little time, as they say. and in the end, i have to pick and choose what to work on.
and yet, at times, i feel like i'm not being a good daughter. that's another thing i've become more conscious about. i'm trying to live my life well and do good things and get busy doing that. i live at home with my parents because it's entirely necessary as i need to not spend on rent in order to decrease this debt i've accumulated during undergrad (evil credit cards!). and i feel obligated to do stuff for my parents since i don't pay rent. but what? i clean what i can, when i'm home. but when's that? when it's time to go to sleep. that's about it. and they don't really understand why my life is like that. so i think they think i'm not a very good daughter. i dunno.... that wasn't a very well formulated thought. but there it is.
just when i think i don't know what to blog about, out it comes. enjoy the weekend! i hear it's gonna be 95 degrees!
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quotable quotes
-
"To try is to risk failure. But risk must be taken because the
greatest hazard of life is to risk nothing. The person who risks
nothing does nothing, has nothing, is nothing. He may avoid
suffering and sorrow, but he simply cannot learn, feel, change,
grow, live, and love."
~unknown
"It has been my experience that folks who have no vices have very few virtues."
~ Abraham Lincoln
"live a life that others will remember years from now, NOT because it pointed to you but because of how it pointed to the One who made you."
~ Mark Hart, the Bible Geek
"we grow up learning to become self-reliant, but really we need to be God-reliant"
"we could learn a lot from crayons: some are sharp, some are pretty, some are dull, some have weird names, and all are different colors....but they all exist very nicely in the same box"
"never wound hearts that love u, never give them the endless pain, because wounded hearts are like roses that never bloom"
"there comes a time when we have to stop loving someone not because that person has stopped loving us but because we have found out that they'd be happier if we'd let go"
