footprints in my heart...

Heartbroken Mom

A mother enters her daughter's bedroom & sees a letter over the bed. With
the worst premonition, she reads it, with trembling hands:

Dear Mom,

It is with great regret & sorrow that I'm telling you that I have eloped
with my new boyfriend. I found real passion & he is so nice, even with all
his piercing & tattoos, and I love riding on the back of his big
motorcycle. But it's not only that mom, I'm pregnant & Ahmed said that we
will be very happy in his trailer in the woods. He wants to have many more
children with me & that's one of my dreams. I've learned that marijuana
doesn't hurt anyone & we'll be growing it for us & his friends, who are
providing us with all the cocaine & ecstasy we may want. In the meantime,
we'll pray for science to find the AIDS cure for Ahmed to get better, he
deserves it. Don't worry Mom, I'm 15 years old now & I know how to take care
of myself. Some day I'll visit so you can get to know your grandchildren.

Your daughter, Judith




PS: Mom, it's not true. I'm next door at Sandy's. I just wanted to show
you that there are worse things in life than my report card that's in my
desk drawer...I love you! -

i've been totally breaking out in zits and i'm nervous as heck for no apparent reason... something's wrong with me... either i'm stressed out or that time of the month is here again. but if it's the second one, it's wayy too early. something's wrong... i hate when i feel all nervous or sad for no reason.

i had a great experience this weekend, something i hadn't done since high school. my mom, my lil brother and i went to a homeless shelter on early sunday morning. along with her adult religious ed class, we cooked and served brunch to over 200 people. there were some moms with kids, some were teenagers, some were elder adults, some were physically disabled, some were mentally disabled, some just made bad decisions and needed to get back on their feet. it was really interesting to talk to some of them. and especially to see the social dynamic within that place. there was a table set up for the kids where another volunteer group was in charge of doing arts and crafts with them. i thought it was cool that the shelter provided a lot of different services. at the gate, there was a guy where some people picked up their mail from. there was a guy doing hair cuts. and of course the racks of clothing. one person was giving out socks and lauren, the little girl beside me, commented how excited people got over socks, as people flocked over to the sock-lady. one man was trying to coax his new friend to get himself some new socks. the new friend-john-was kinda new to the whole thing and he felt kinda uncomfortable about getting some new socks. he told his friend that he could just wash the socks he had and that there were other people who needed them more. i don't think he was being prideful about it or was ashamed about getting some. i think he was just really thinking of other people he saw who really did look like they needed it more than he.

i later had a nice talk with john and found out how he came to be there. he's a pretty normal guy who just made some bad decisions and ended up in jail for 3 months. he was a computer programmer who was also a musician, and i have no doubt he can get back on his feet. i thought about how some people complain and say that the homeless are just all lazy and don't want jobs. but there are actually a lot of mentally disabled ones who wouldn't be able to get normal jobs. i saw other workers there talking to other people around the yard and i thought that besides the food and shelter, these people also just need someone to talk to. you could see that in the yard. it was like a huge family over there cuz they all knew each other. their kids played together and the moms greeted each other. john was there as if invited by that one friend of his. it was nice to get to know john. he had a very gentle manner about him and he just needs a fresh start.

there was this group from ranch0 santa margarita there. if you don't know, ranch0 sta. margarita is a pretty affluent area in south 0range county. oh goodness, they so looked like fish out of water. even the adults looked extremely uncomfortable, even as they asked us what they could do. i tried to make conversation with one of the adults, asking if they came here with another group, meaning another volunteer group. i think she misunderstood me and thought that i was asking if she was one of the homeless people and she looked uncomfortable, and got slightly defensive as she told me what church they came from and that the kids were there to get service hours. the kids (mostly blonde trendy teenage girls) were clumped together like vinegar in oil. it was really interesting to see that. someone else came up to me and asked what i was getting in return for being there that sunday morning, if i was getting credits for school or something like that. and i told him, nothing, i'm just there with my mom and my brother. i thought of the rancho sta margrta kids and how they were there to get service hours, but didn't really want to be there, they just had to be there. i think it's really important for them to see such things and how different people's lives can be just a few miles from them. but i think they were only too happy to go back to their extremely comfortable lives without a thought to those people again.

the process for serving brunch was very organized and prevented mass stampedes. all the people had to be seated in order to be served and the volunteers went along the assembly line to get plates of food to serve to the people. the girl beside me was really loud and outgoing and she kept asking the volunteers to get names of the people they were serving, where they were from, and one good thing that happened to them that week. for the kids who actually asked, i think it forced them to get to know these people and understand their lives a little bit. they're forced to see them, not just as some entity they serve for a day, but that these people have lives and they've got a background too.

i totally want to bring our heaven sent youth group kids there. these people live on donations and i really liked how we saw how directly our contributions were used. sometimes we just put old clothes in a bag and take them to a place, but never really see who receives them. it was nice to see them make use of what was given to them. they need so much and it was nice to be able to give. we're not rich or anything, but we can definitely afford to give to people who are more needy than us. i thought about how annoyed i was that morning to have to get up at 7am on a sunday. some of those people didn't even have the luxury of a bed or a shower. i was really glad i came.

and yeah, i saw Him in every single one of those people. thank You for letting me get to know You through them.

courtesy of franny:

1: Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, find line 4. Write down what it says:
Termination of Partners

2: Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What do you touch first?
my radio

3: What is the last thing you watched on TV?
iron chef!

4: WITHOUT LOOKING, guess what time it is?
2pm?

5: Now look at the clock, what is the actual time?
1:46 pm

6: With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?
"heaven" by los lonely boys playing on the radio :)

7: When did you last step outside?
after lunch in the cafeteria, i accompanied my co-worker on a smoking break. his smoking break, not mine, i don't smoke.

8: Before you came to this website, what did you look at?
lil jay's website

9: What are you wearing?
gray slacks, a flowery top and matching cardigan

10: Did you dream last night?
yes, something about swimming?

11: When did you last laugh?
today during lunch when my co-worker told a joke he heard.

12: What is on the walls of the room you are in?
around my cube is a calendar and menus from restaurants in the area, along the wall of the large room, there are watercolor pictures of a mountain ridge.

13: Seen anything weird lately?
homeless transvestite with fake nipples showing through his/her shirt

14: What do you think of this quiz?
fun & different.

15: What is the last film you saw?
kill bill 2. don't expect as much action as the first one. but i thought it was equally great.

16: If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy first?
pay off debt-mine, my parents, then my brothers' education.

17: Tell me something about you that I don't know:
i'm going to san francisco on thursday.

18: If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?
i'd make people think about others first, instead of themselves or their own agendas.

19: Do you like to dance?
yes, love it!

20: George Bush:
i don't pay much attn to stuff like this, but somehow, there's something not right or something i don't like about him.

21: Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?
mary_________ rose... with the blank to be decided with my husband. but lately i've been liking emily.

22: Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?
i've always liked the name jonathan and phillip. hmmm jonathan phillip? phillip jonathan?

23: Would you ever consider living abroad?
yes, but only if i had someone with me. i'm too chicken to just up and leave by myself. i need social support.

they had this fantastic coffee in the coffee area today... it's hawaiian hazelnut. i normally don't drink coffee and when i do, i take only half a cup. i got all excited over the hawaiian coffee and i drank a whole cup of it. i'm sooo jitteryyy... typing at a million strokes per second... goodness...

i told you my lil brother cracks me up right? family friends came over from the phillipines last night and of course they have pasalubong (gifts you bring for the people you visit). like many asian cultures, filipinos like their name brand things, even if they're fake. so they brought my brothers and my dad wallets.

my brother goes: why is larry vriton so popular anyway?

i had to pause and think about it for a millisecond, then i cracked up so bad! somehow, i pictured cousin larry from perfect strangers with the curly hair and all. i don't know what the chic designer looks like, but i don't think he would have appreciated that comparison!


courtesy of TangmaN

hahaah! one of them days... i totally know how she feels!

you gotta check this out. but it might change by next week, so see this one before it goes (archive: april 18-24).

for cici, here's another good one:

Sitting in a church won't make you a Christian any more than sitting in the henhouse will make you a hen.

the visual made me laugh. but it's sad that yeah, people think it's just about going to church.

i met someone when i used to work at campus village housing in uci. he was here for vacation for 2-3 summers from france. he's a really nice guy and we would chit chat in the community center where i worked and we would AIM each other. even now, though rarely, we'll still catch each other online.

i was looking at my referrers and someone keeps searching my name under the french g00gle. i wonder who it is? is it you charles? if not, leave me a comment anyway, i'm curious who could be interested in my little life all the way from france....

i have to do a persuasive speech for my speech class in a couple of weeks. i chose to talk about love. it's not that controversial of a subject, i know, but there's a twist to my talk. people often think of love as that fairy-tale love or "falling in love" as if you just happened to stumble upon it. my speech seeks to persuade my class to think of love as a choice, as an active choice that we make every day of our lives. it's something that doesn't just come or something that you fall into. it's something that you very actively choose to do so. when i read this, i thought he was reading my mind. part of my homework is done! thank you Lord!

What is love?

Love - so often we want it, but so seldom do we really, truly focus on
what it is.

Love is not a feeling. Happiness is a feeling.
Love is not an emotion. Anger is an emotion.
Love is not a “state”. Confusion is a state.
(So is Delaware, the first state in fact, but I digress…)

While love can have all of these expressions associated with it, it is
still more – so much more. Love is a decision.

What we are formed by and immersed in so often, though, is the worldly
interpretations and definitions of love, which are often short-sighted
and self-directed.

Let's review:
The world says that “love is blind”. The truth, however, is that LOVE
sees 20/20. It sees our imperfections, our sin and our failings – all
of our humanity, and says, “I still choose to love you.”

The world says that “love means never having to say you are sorry”.
That’s a crock. You want the truth? Ask a married couple. They’ll tell
you, “Love means having to say you are sorry A LOT.”

The world says that “love is give and take”. They’re half right. Love
is GIVE. The “and take” is often added out of fear…fear that the other
is not going to offer love back, fear that the other will take
advantage and manipulate and fear that we’ll be left with nothing in return.
There’s nothing “and take” about the cross. The Lord gives us Salvation
and we don’t even “take” that – we receive it.

The world says that “love is priceless”. Not true. Love carries a
price tag, a heavy one, and He picked up the tab, for you and for me. We
never could have flipped that bill, but Jesus paid the price.

The world also tells us that “love doesn’t come in a box”. Yes it
does. Love dwells in the “box” in every church, in the Tabernacle where
love dwells in the flesh, for you and I to adore.

The world tells us that “love doesn’t grow on trees”. Yes it does.
Love GREW out of a tree on Calvary that day. The tree of love was
planted on stony ground (our hearts) and the roots (Jesus’ blood) ran deep
below the earth, crushing sin and ushering in LIFE.

Pray today's verse, really pray it. Recite it, learn it and know it, remembering, too, that “we love BECAUSE He first loved us” (1 John 4:19).

I once read, “A bell’s not a bell until you ring it. A song’s not a song until you sing it. Love in your heart is not put there to stay. Love isn’t love until you give it away.”

The Christian knows where to find love in the midst of a world that does not. Offer love today, in its purest form, and you will wake up tomorrow more like God, who is love.

SALVATION GIVEN
“See what love the Father has bestowed on us that we may be called the
children of God. Yet so we are. The reason the world does not know us
is that it did not know him.” – 1 John 3:1

Decide to love. Seek love.
Without it you’re not really living…only breathing.

~ the Bible Geek


Even if you're not that religious, it still poses very good points about love. We often think of love as a verb, but don't forget that it can also be a noun. Be love!

it was spent with old and new friends in many different ways...

friday nite, i had to work on the presentation for the confirmation parents to promote our heaven sent youth ministry to them. it was actually a really nice powerpoint presentation and i met with giselle and melissa to put together a nice slideshow for the kids. and in the midst of laughing at pictures & playing with powerpoint animation (esp. the sounds!), the three of us had a nice conversation about God, our faith development, mistakes we've made, & how we want to keep the kids from making these same mistakes... it was a nice talk with the gals!

saturday highlights include:
~ chiropractor appt. thank goodness cuz i knew i'd be doing some dancing sat nite!
~ drove 2.5 hours to poway in san diego county. it was only supposed to be 1.5, but the freakin rain and people can't drive, aughhh!

~ i was late to jeremie and judy's wedding! but i made it just in time to hear the vows!

~ waterworks... i barely made it to a seat on the pew at church and saw how happy jeremie was as he recited his vows. judy was already all choked up as she said hers, and that started the tears welling up in my eyes! little did i know that was only the beginning!

~ new friend! i met khoa's girlfriend, shannon, and she was totally cool! we bonded cuz all the people we knew at the wedding were in the wedding party and had wedding duties to take care of. we sat in the same table, while they were at the head table. i don't like that setting by the way. i like the recent trends of having a "sweetheart table" for the couple, while the wedding party can sit with the rest of the guests.

~ the food: salmon or chicken stuffed with something or other. i had the salmon, omg, it was a huge steak of it! and really juicey and yummy, paired up with this lemon creamy sauce. if i had a digital camera, i'd have a picture of it right . i finished it all, of course! shannon couldn't even finish all of hers. but she ate all the rice though. the photographer guy next to me had the chicken. i asked him how it was, and he just sort of nodded and said, mmm, dry and i said to him, yeah, i figured. that's why i got the salmon. and he said, yeah, i like to cook, so drying out a chicken is just... it's a tragedy. poor guy, he barely touched his food and he had them take it away already. i almost never get chicken at weddings. it's almost guaranteed that they'll be dry.

~ waterworks 2: *sigh* the father-daughter dance... oh when they annouced it, people started clapping and judy and her dad walked up to the dance floor. she was already wiping tears from her eyes as she walked down. as she met him, she gave him a kiss on the cheek. i was imagining my dad and how much i love him. (dangit, i'm tearing up again!) and i was picturing how it would be during my wedding and i'd tell him papa, i love you. (damn, my sappiness! *wiping tears*)

~ the bride: okay, you know how they go ding, ding, ding on the wine glasses to signal the new couple to kiss, right? hehehe, this girl! jeremie was all ready for the nice sweet peck on the lips, but dude! judy would be trying to slip in some open-mouthed kisses in there and ooh, goodness... i don't need to see that! the photographer told our table that the same thing happened this morning when they went to the park for some pictures. they were trying to set up some nice shots and she kept trying to slip him the tongue! and she totally wants to include pictures where they have her looking all sweet and innocent in one, and jeremie sticking his finger to peek down her cleavage in another! oh my goodness! heheeh! i'm so totally happy for jeremie to get a woman like that! he definitely deserves the fun that i know she can provide!

~ the dancing: electric slide (i didn't know there was a real song to the dance!), todo-todo, some reggae, cha-cha, booty music where the bride got down on the groom, the honeymoon money dance where i told jeremie how happy i was for him... henry called me the dancing whore of the evening cuz i danced with everyone. i actually just danced with him, jeremie's dad, mom, jeremie & judy, jeremie's sister-in-law and 3-yr-old niece, Kitana (yes, named after the mortal kombat chick), and oh, i can't forget tito ed! tito ed and his wife are the classic ballroom dancing filipino couple. they danced so beautifully and professionally together, from swing, to cha-cha, to anything... i was dancing and talking with jeremie's mom and before you knew it, she had me by the arm, leading me to tito ed's table where she made him promise to dance with me when a better song comes on. and tito ed made really good on his promise as he manila-swinged me for 2-3 songs straight! oh my goodness, it was so much fun! he twirled and twisted me around so much that i felt like i was on a roller coaster! my shoe already came undone and we still kept going! tito ed's the best!

~ cleanup: i didn't have to be anywhere that evening and i didn't have anyone with me to tell me they wanted to leave already, so i stayed and hung out with the family and helped clean up. it went by fast and it was nice cuz i got to chit chat with jeremie and judy a lil more. it was nice cuz as i met jeremie's family throughout the evening, it seemed like they had known me or of me for a long time. even his sister-in-law recognized me name. they were even inviting me to stayover the night, but i graciously declined.

~ home in less than 1.5 hours! it was the super loveliest sweetest wedding i've been to in a long time though and i am really happy for jeremie and judy. i've seen jeremie go through some rough heartaches to his all-women-suck-and-i'm-just-gonna-use-them phase, and i'm really happy that he's found judy to truly love and appreciate him as he loves her. i went home in really high spirits even though my back ached from the dancing. it was the first time i've worn heels in 3 weeks b/c of the accident. but i didn't care, cuz i was really happy.

sunday was nice and easy... mass at 11:30am, grocery for the meeting that never happened. oh, lost my keys, but fr. joe found them this morning in the church. i wasn't too worried about it anyway. the presentation we were preparing for on friday never happened. we had technical difficulties with the projector and the laptop and the microphone. aughh, so frustrating. but i just spoke a little blurb instead of the really nice and jazzy presentation and slide show. oh well, maybe we can use it for next time instead.

and we finished off the weekend with disneyland fireworks! ines and theresa are a crackup!it was a lovely, lovely weekend filled with friends and laughter... thank you Lord!

# posted by dorothy : 4/19/2004 11:45:00 AM |

happy birthday regina! hope it was fantastic!

i love this song for its subtle reggae beat and the great harmonization of the voices. i finally found the lyrics for this song and i love it even more:

Save me from this prison
Lord, help me get away
'Cause only you can save me now
From this misery

Well I've been lost in my own place
And I'm getting' weary
How far is heaven?
And I know that I need to change
My ways of living
How far is heaven?
Lord, can you tell me?

I've been locked up way too long
In this crazy world
How far is heaven?
I just keep on prayin', Lord
I just keep on livin'
How far is heaven?
(Oh, Lord, can you tell me?)
How far is heaven?
(I just gotta know how far it is)
How far is heaven?
(Oh, Lord, can you tell me?)

'Cause I know there's a better place
In this place I'm livin'
How far is heaven?
So I just got to show some faith
And just keep on givin'
How far is heaven?
(Oh, Lord can you tell me)
How far is heaven?
(I just gotta know how far it is)
How far is heaven?
(Oh, Lord, can you tell me?)
How far is heaven?
I just gotta know how far
I just wanna know how far

some people have the impression that religion is to keep people in line and keep them behaving in a "good" way. that gets kind of vague because "goodness" can be an arbirtrary term. i'm sure the suicide bombers of the twin towers thought that what they were doing was "good" because they were doing it for their religion. this impression stems from the "reward" that people think they will receive from doing good deeds. moreover, some people think that they will be rewarded for their good deeds especially after persevering through misery, and God somehow owes them the bit of happiness they're searching for. it's the sentiment of okay, God, i did this for You. it sucked, but i followed You. now you better give me what i've been wanting, cuz i suffered for You. now, this sounds like sacrifice, doesn't it? and isn't that a good thing? but it's a very manipulative sort of sacrifice. it's the conditional sacrifice, saying i'll do this for you, if you do this for me

that's not what our Faith is about. it's not just to keep people in line. and it's not just to be rewarded. the point is that you love Him so much and so dearly that you recognize Him in everyone and everything in your life-good or bad, unconditionally. and because you see Him in everyone and everything, you treat everyone well, you do good deeds for other people, because you love Him and you love everyone (yes, even your enemies). you love, not because you will receive a reward, but just simply because you love Him and them. when you continue to love and forgive without counting the costs to yourself, without wanting a reward for your deeds, without wanting even recognition... that is how you will reach heaven.

and what is heaven? it's not just the happiness of getting what you want, but it's being with Him, Whom you love, He who is Love. it's the everlasting joy of being with Him forever and ever.

ate
too
much
mexican food.
soo good
but
stomach
owie
soo bad

*doubled over in cramping pain*

i've been slacking on these posts. also, i wasn't ready to post this. i had a huge disappointment this week. i so had my heart set on it and i totally thought i was gonna get it, but alas, i counted my chickens before they hatched. and i received a very thin envelope from western u on tuesday. of course it was the lovely rejection letter from the program that i had my heart set on.

but i met Him in all this because at first, i was numbed and i didn't want to think about it. but right before i opened the letter, i just said a quick and silent prayer, saying okay Lord, whatever you want, wherever you need me to be, you know what i'd like, but i'll go wherever it is you lead me... Your will be done, not mine. i think it totally helped when i read those disappointing words. and i was okay immediately after. just went on with my business and ate dinner, laughed at friends and got ready for bed... and cried that i didn't get what i really really wanted. but He comforted me as i thought i wonder what window He'll open for me... i remembered the sound of music when the mother superior told maria that when the Lord closes a door, He always opens a window. and yes, i'm disappointed, but it's not where He wants me to be, so i'll just follow. He's got a larger plan. and i can't wait for it to unfold.

thank You, Lord for guiding and blessing my life. on this day that we remember Your Passion and sorrow, may we offer our life to you every day and love others like You love us so unconditionally. luvulord!

owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww...... what awful cramps i have this month! oh my goodness, my hormones are sky-high this month! no wonder i've been so fatigued and extra bloated, and extra craving sweets and chocolate. and the headache that usually accompanies this time of the month lasted for 2 days!

funny, cuz caroline was talking about feeling the ovary release the egg one time and i was totally trying to watch out for it this month. i think i felt it last week when i first felt a cramp- a milder one, not like the i-can't-breathe-don't-move-me kind that i'm having now. and i remember thinking, hmm, i wonder if i just released an egg...

for those who haven't had sex ed or health ed (courtesy of feminist women's health center and university of virginia's bio 121 class- both very interesting, comprehensive, and informative!):

have a good one. go to mass if you're catholic.

i gotta clean and get everything off the floor. we're getting the carpets steam-cleaned. i'm expecting them to be creamy white like new again, instead of the dingy light brown that it's been for years and years.

whoohoo, going to dineylan again tonight! yes, just to buy a gift for a good friend, but it's still the happiest place on earth!

i've been thoroughly exhausted this week. had a speech (got an A!), a huge disappointment that i cried over, and a midterm (got a B+, dang it, should've been an A!). i'm mentally and emotionally drained. oh and i woke up with a headache today, so physically too. i'd say thank god for the weekend, but everyone's coming over on sunday for easter, so i'm spending the weekend as cinderella for my mother.

have a happy and holy thursday everyone!

it's straightforward, short, and simple. courtesy of art

BLUE You give your love and friendship unconditionaly. You enjoy long, thoughtful conversations rich in philosophy and spirituality. You are very loyal and intuitive. Find out your color at Quiz Me!

i thought i'd give them credit for this one. it's pretty funny!

The Guys' Rules

At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down. Finally, the guys' side of the story.

We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules! Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.
That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.
See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls,
don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways
and one of the ways makes you sad or angry,
we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something
or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible,
please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing,"
we will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to,
expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear
is fine...Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are
prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation,
or monster trucks.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
but did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

Pass this to as many men as you can -
to give them a laugh.

Pass this to as many women as you can -
to give them a bigger laugh!!

heaven by the los lonely boys is awesome! i love the subtle reggae beats and the way their voices blend together so nicely! love it!

by the way... taxes are finally done... after all that mess with my parents, i just ended up filing by myself online. it was pretty easy but i'm so pissed off, cuz i'm getting less than 1/3 refund than what i got last year! and i made less money last year! aughhh! but i have a feeling the tax guy that we left did something he wasn't supposed to last year. so at least it's legit now. but dang, i certainly could've used $3000!

lots have happened, i just was lazy to blog:

~ finally got my dsl after being lost in the mailroom for a week. took me over an hour to run the cable through the wall between my parents' and my bedroom. the cord kept getting stuck inside the wall! but i'm still not hooked up, cuz something's wrong with my computer.

~ had a good happy hour. nice to see gideon, michelle (that's her name, right?), caroline, jonathan, dan, and henry. the pizzas are always great over at bj's! and that framboise ale was good, but i don't seem to care for the raspberry drinks too much.

~ had no class on wednesday: cesar chavez holiday. thank you to the labor workers

~ went to disneyland and california adventure with my cousins and glenn and his cousin last weekend (yeah, i kno, i'm posting late). had a great day and the best part is that we got in for free! thanx to tito rudy and jessica!

~ had a great time hanging out with lana last friday! i see her like once a year, but when we do, it's like we just saw each other yesterday. i love low-maintenance friendships! but we're definitely gonna try to make it more like once a month. and yummm! we had california roll factory in west la (on santa monica blvd, just before barrington) and went to the grand lux cafe in the beverly center for dessert! we had the beignets (oh my god, i could eat a whole order of it!) and the creme brulee (norman's is better though!)

~ i've been going in to the chiropractor on M, W, Sat for treatment. and there's been an awesome improvement! thank the Lord! i couldn't even bend over without it hurting!

up for this weekend: dazer day at the park! i love seeing old friends.

my friends... some of my friends have been going through some tough times with their family or with their health. they are such beautiful people who exemplify BEING love with their entire life. my gosh, it makes me feel so bad for all the times i took people for granted or just plain complained about the state of my life. i've had it really good-really really good. i have such love around me and yeah, my back hurts, but i'm getting treatment for it. and my parents are still alive. another friend of mine just had her mom pass away late last year. i wonder how her family's christmas was...

and we have enough. not an excessive amounts of extra cash lying around. but enough to live in a nice little cottage-like home. and that's what it truly is... it's a home. someplace i know i can always come home to, even after i've hurt my family, even after the shameful, disrespectful things i've done... i know they'll always come running after me, with open arms, loving me... omg, i'm so crying right now. in the middle of work... sheesh... wait, lemme wipe my tears...

i would ask my mom when i was little, mama, are we rich? and my mom would say with a twinkle in her eye, we're rich in love!

i gotta wipe my tears again...

if i never told you, i love and appreciate you and our friendship, whether or not we've met, or if i haven't seen you in awhile or if i never see you again, thank you for being in my life. i love you!

dang, maybe it's that time of the month...